Portland Home Caregivers

Guardian Angel Caregivers in Portland OR - Provides home care & home health in Portland West Hills, East Portland, Clackamas, Gresham, Boring, Happy Valley, Oregon City, Downtown Portland. Call us today 503-698-2020 or email Guardian Angel Caregivers info@guardianangelhelp.com.

Guardian Angel Caregivers delivers more information for Portland family caregivers – Stages of Grief.

After the passing of the last parent, family members often flail around in an ocean of emotion, under the false impression they are moving toward solid ground. However, with each wave, the tide pulls them out a little farther away from safety. They drown in their individual agendas.

The solution is simple: Swim parallel to the shore until you emerge from troubled waters. Keep together as you call out encouragement. (“You can do it!” “We can do it!”) Support each other.

It would appear that sibling estrangement is epidemic. At book signings and talks, through letters and emails, I have repeatedly heard baby boomers lament the dissolution of the family unit in the wake of a loved one’s death.

One woman shared that she expects no future interaction with her brother since their last parent died because his wife got involved in the division of their mother’s possessions. When she tried to talk with him about it, he became outraged, more focused on his wife’s hurt feelings than those of his siblings. When professionals encounter sibling estrangements, it is important to know the resources.

Our last post on sibling grief will post on October 2. Thank you for visiting.

Family Caregiver Portland – Stages of Grief

Continuing our post on the stages of grief – most family caregivers feel that they come full circle when dealing with eldercare in Portland.

Estrangement

One can find oneself walking on a very thin, high wire with other people’s families.

When an aged friend was diagnosed with cancer, I witnessed the effects of the existing estrangement in her family and was careful when I got involved. She asked for my help because she would need it if her dying wishes were to come true. The members of her decades-old love-hate relationship with her son smoldered while I delicately assisted with her pre-arrangements and attended to her most personal needs.

This woman’s sister had been shut out of her life for years. After my friend’s death, a box of letters was found in her basement. The sister’s handwritten notes implored reconciliation many times over the miles and years. The envelopes had been opened, but my friend apparently ignored this one-way correspondence to her death. At least, this is what the sister sadly told me when I notified her that the end was near. By then, it was too late for resolution.

“I am never speaking to my brother/sister/mother/father again!” It is easier to live up to that declaration than it is to resolve the issue that prompted the announcement. Especially when family members are not close in proximity, they may drift apart — even if they do survive being caught in a grief riptide.

Guardian Angel Caregivers in Portland OR - Provides home care & home health in Portland West Hills, East Portland, Clackamas, Gresham, Boring, Happy Valley, Oregon City, Downtown Portland. Call us today 503-698-2020 or email Guardian Angel Caregivers info@guardianangelhelp.com.

Home Caregivers Portland – Respite Care

When discussing the stages of grief – family caregivers have feeling that run full circle and sometimes they feel they are on a roller coaster.

Greed

People can accumulate a mountain of possessions or wealth during a lifetime. If gifts are not made before death, look out for the circling buzzards. Some families hire security guards for their home during a memorial service for protection against thieves — even thieves who are family members.

A coroner tells this story: “The family was at the funeral, and as the casket was lowered into the ground, a group of distant family members sped back to the decedent’s home, where they broke in and started stealing things. The burglar alarm was turned on, so the police showed up as these people were carrying stuff out of the house. One cousin was hiding silverware in her thigh-high stockings, with a silver tray crammed in her backside waistband. The cops made them all disrobe on the front lawn. The adult children were flabbergasted.”

The scenarios are varied and endless. The spouse of a surviving son or daughter gets upset if the parent’s stuff is thrown out or donated, and requests to ransack all garbage. Without asking the others, a sibling makes off with the family jewels. Items are taken or missing. Who has these things?

A sense of entitlement, need or intense desire may override a person’s normal tendencies if he or she is tempted with a material or monetary windfall. Posturing might begin long before a life ends. Greed gives a sense of fairness the permission to take a hike … and keep on walking.

Guardian Angel Caregivers in Portland OR - Provides home care & home health in Portland West Hills, East Portland, Clackamas, Gresham, Boring, Happy Valley, Oregon City, Downtown Portland. Call us today 503-698-2020 or email Guardian Angel Caregivers info@guardianangelhelp.com.

Portland Home Care Planning for Seniors

Guardian Angel Caregivers in Portland OR - Provides home care & home health in Portland West Hills, East Portland, Clackamas, Gresham, Boring, Happy Valley, Oregon City, Downtown Portland. Call us today 503-698-2020 or email Guardian Angel Caregivers info@guardianangelhelp.com.

The three stages of grief

Humor

Arguably, some of the funniest humor is the darkest. For visitation at a funeral home, the deceased sports fan is laid out in his favorite recliner, dressed in his team’s colors with a beer can cradled in one hand and a TV remote-control device placed in the other. “That’s what Dad would have wanted,” insists one family member, while another one is not so sure.

During the division of non-titled property, one sibling chooses an heirloom while quipping, “Mom would have wanted me to have this because she loved me best.” Perhaps this is said in jest, and a brother might laugh with the others while he is thinking, “Mom did not love you best, sister.” He stuffs his actual sentiment down inside himself.

An overtired and unattended grandchild careens through the cemetery as the graveside service drags on, eliciting chuckles from some of the mourners. Others are appalled.

Gallows humor provides release while passive-aggressiveness gives relief to those who speak under their breath, letting off steam in small doses. Like Band-aids, smart remarks cover up little cuts. However, if wounds are not soothed, they might not heal — or worse, they might close with ugly scars that are constant reminders of some ill-perceived wrong that has been committed. People may laugh, but nothing is said. “Wrongs” are not confronted. Issues remain unsettled.

Portland Senior Planning

Rather than pre-plan for death, many elders display avoidance behavior and pretend it will not happen to them. “My kids can just deal with it after I am gone” is a common refrain for those who do not realize that their lack of planning is a recipe for the breakup of their survivors. Professionals who work with boomers often see this type of thinking and avoidance.

What happens to a family when it is not prepared for the passing of its parents?

Three Stages of Grief

The famous five stages of grief brought forth in 1969 by Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross in her book On Death and Dying are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. They do not always happen in that order, we are told, and there is no typical time frame for each stage’s duration.

The same might be said for three more stages of grief that I would like to add to the doctor’s list:

• humor
• greed
• estrangement

Guardian Angel Caregivers in Portland OR - Provides home care & home health in Portland West Hills, East Portland, Clackamas, Gresham, Boring, Happy Valley, Oregon City, Downtown Portland. Call us today 503-698-2020 or email Guardian Angel Caregivers info@guardianangelhelp.com.

Senior Care Planning in Portland

Guardian Angel Caregivers in Portland OR - Provides home care & home health in Portland West Hills, East Portland, Clackamas, Gresham, Boring, Happy Valley, Oregon City, Downtown Portland. Call us today 503-698-2020 or email Guardian Angel Caregivers info@guardianangelhelp.com.

Baby Boomers Are Crossing the Street Without Parents — Are Professionals Ready to Help?

At least 1.7 million Americans age 65 and older will die in 2008, according to a projection from the Centers for Disease Control based on pre-2005 data, recent happenings and the growing older population. Of those, many will be the last surviving parent, often departing without a plan or even a simple will. No family meetings. No wishes expressed. No items presented with loving words. How do we, as professionals, help tie up those loose ends?

If half of this demographic leaves behind three children — many would leave more, others would leave no survivors — about 2.5 million adults would be orphaned in the United States next year. Some of these aging offspring already suffer strained sibling relationships left over from childhood. So, potentially, a large number of grown-up baby boomers will act like children when their parents are not around to provide supervision. Nobody will be watching the kids!

Professionals working with baby boomers need to be well schooled in this issue in order to help their clients. We need to be well connected with other professionals outside of our area of expertise in order to serve this power population.

Alzheimer’s Home Care in Portland

Guardian Angel Caregivers in Portland OR - Provides Alzheimer’s & dementia home care in Portland West Hills, East Portland, Clackamas, Gresham, Boring, Happy Valley, Oregon City, Downtown Portland. Call us today 503-698-2020 or email Guardian Angel Caregivers info@guardianangelhelp.com.

Exercise: It’s not just for bodies anymore 

Research shows that challenging the brain, such as doing crossword puzzles, solving brain teasers, working Sudoku or starting a new hobby, can provide a boost to the brain, and helps preserve brain function in normal individuals. Activities such as these are being recommended more frequently, as a way to help keep the brain young and healthy in seniors, regardless of age or health. These activities can ward off dementia and Alzheimer ’s disease.

Internet-accessible computer activities are even more successful than classic exercises of mental stimulation, such as art and music therapy, commonly used in people with dementia. The idea that with training, the brain can be rewired to learn new skills has grown into its own “industry.” Nintendo reports that what it calls “gray gamers” pushed their second-quarter profits, in 2006, up eightfold.

In addition to ‘brain exercises’, one study showed men 71 and older who walked less than a quarter of a mile a day were nearly twice as likely to develop dementia as those who walked more than two miles a day. Physical exercise helps individuals maintain cognitive abilities well into older age. Lifelong mild exercise decreases cellular aging in the brain and is the most important component of sustained cognitive functioning.

Exercising the mind is important; the more you try to remember, the better your skill at remembering! But remember to exercise the body, too! To find brain teasers on-line, go to http://www.aarp.org/fun/puzzles/ or http://www.sharpbrains.com.

Home Care Portland – Aging Seniors

Home Care Portland for seniors & elders – Guardian Angel Caregivers - 503-698-2020.

The Science
• Research is being conducted both on human populations and animals in order to isolate genes that may lead to longevity

• The Albert Einstein College of Medicine, with Dr. Barzilai heading the research team, has been studying the affects of Cholestryl Ester Transfer Protein (CETP) and Insulin-like Growth Factor (IGF1)  on the centenarians and the Ashkenazi Jews in Europe

• What is CETP? A protein that regulates lipoproteins and their participle size. In mutations, the levels of “good” HDL” cholesterol are increased, which is connected to reducing cardiovascular disease.

• What is IGF1 – a growth factor which instigates growth in children and tissue development in adults

• The dwarf gene – studied in mice and by analyzing the people in Krk, Croatia, who live an average of 50% longer than North Americans

The People

• The Ashkenazi Jews – the study focused upon 213 individuals, aged 95 to 107

• The centenarians – have above average age populations that keep on growing; with over 74,000 of them worldwide which is expected to increase to 5 million by 2100

• The Krk, Croatians – stand about 4 feet 5 inches tall

The Challenges

• According to Richard A. Miller, professor of pathology and research scientist for the Institute of Gerontology, only a small portion of the United States’ research budget is allocated for examination of aging

• Drugs that do slow aging cannot be tested in enough time to draw a big profit for corporations

• That patent office in the US does not turn over approval quickly enough for these products

• The general public does not show enough respect for elders

While it is true that there are limited resources available to focus upon this type of health related research, researchers hope to get to their goal eventually. As Dr. Barzilai explains, “In this way, we can focus on preventing or  delaying the onset of age-related diseases, which can help give people a better quality of life as they get older.”

http://www.ur.umich.edu/0001/Dec11_00/4.htm

Physical health slows aging process in Portland

Long Term Care for elders in Portland - Guardian Angel Caregivers - 503-698-2020.

TIPS ON PHYSICAL HEALTH THAT SLOW THE AGING PROCESS

Studies have proven that those who lead generally healthy lives, which include a well-balanced diet and routine physical activity, live longer. According to S. Jay Olashansky, PhD, Professor of Public Health at the University of

Illinois, this is where the focus of today’s senior’s should rest; rather than focusing upon the expensive anti-aging treatments that alter the regular aging process. While, admittedly, research is being conducted scientifically that

demonstrates the possibility of slowing aging, the best method to help ensure longevity is to maintain a healthy lifestyle.

Exercise

According to About.com, a study published in a 2008 issue of the Archives of Internal Medicine, the more active people showed a slowing of cell development that correlates with aging; consistent with sedentary people ten years younger.

• Engage in moderate exercise for 30 minutes 5 days per week; it can be broken up into 10 minute increments and have the same benefits
• Choose exercises that are consistent with your own physical capabilities
• Seniors may benefit from less strenuous activities such as walking, or exercise programs in the pool that are easy on joints
• Activities that have the most benefit are aerobic and cardiovascular in nature that raise the heart rate and cause a sweat
• Strength training with light weights or resistance bands should be incorporated 2-3 days a week (8-12 repetitions of each exercise) to maintain muscle mass and bone density
• Add balance and flexibility exercises to reduce the likelihood of falls

Nutrition

Older adults also experience a number of nutritional deficiencies that occur naturally with aging, and should be balanced with a diet of these nutrient rich foods or vitamin supplements.

• Zinc – found in oysters, clams, poultry, whole grains and lean beef. Helps to maintain a strong immune system and fight off disease and illness
• Vitamin B6 – prevalent in bananas, potatoes, kidney beans, pinto beans and clams. Keeps the nerves and brain in optimal working order, and may be lacking in adults over 50 due to changes in the stomach
• Calcium – best obtained by consuming low or fat-free dairy products in order to maintain strong bones and bone density. 3 glasses of skim milk per day, or the equivalent in low-fat yogurts, cheeses etc will meet an older adult’s daily requirement.

Unhappiness Effects Senior Health in Portland

If you care for an elder in Portland or oversee elder care for a relative and need help, please call Guardian Angel Caregivers in Portland at 503-698-2020.

Being unhappy, complaining, whining, and even nagging can effect elders or seniors health.. it is important to know it’s effects on your health.

Q3 – Are these health repercussions due to complaining and nagging, only prevalent in seniors?

A3 – A separate research study by the Lafayette College that focused upon younger couples found that hostility in a marriage can actually weaken the immune system and increase the likelihood of illness like colds and flu. Therefore, it has been demonstrated that nagging can affect couples of all ages.

Q4 – What causes a person to nag or whine?

A4 – Often the person whinning may not even realize he/she is complaining or nagging; but it typically results from something that is important to him/her but not to their spouse. It often centers on household duties, and comes from the person who is typically responsible for these chores when help is required. Complaining usually only occurs once a couple of requests have been made to a spouse, but after receiving no response, the individual becomes frustrated.

Q5 – What can individuals do to prevent nagging?

A5 – According to Michele Weiner-Davis a marriage and family therapist and author, the bottom-line is effective communication. Blame should not be assigned; partners should communicate their frustrations calmly, clearly and directly; and individuals with the urge to nag should focus upon positive experiences of the past with their partner’s responsiveness to their needs, rather than focusing upon the negative of the particular situation.

Home Care in Portland Guardian Angel Caregivers - Call (503) 698-2020.